What is the secret to contentment? Why is it so elusive? We all seek it and yet very few of us have it. We are bombarded with "solutions" for discontent everywhere and all the time. This or that product will finally give you the feeling of wholeness. The next iPhone will be the last product you'll ever need... until the next model comes out. This car, that house, this job, that amount of money, this therapy, that new drug, etc... — these are the stories we tell ourselves when we can finally put aside the feeling of subtle misery we walk around with 24/7.
The problem is, no situation will ever be perfect because the source of our discontent doesn't lie in external circumstances. It lies in the mind. It is the mind which generates the stories of our lives. It is the mind that obsesses over problems or fixates on wants and desires — never being satisfied. And, it is the mind that will continue to find problems no matter how "perfect" our lives look on paper.
One of the greatest misconceptions about contentment is that we mistake pleasure for happiness. If a favorite food brought true happiness, then the more we ate the happier we would become. But the opposite is true — that first bite is the best and if we keep eating we eventually become sick and miserable. What brings us true lasting happiness will allow us to deepen our peace and joy the more we do it, not less.
Knowing that the pleasure-chasing mind creates all problems, we also know that the solution also lies within the mind. We can train our mind to become peaceful and joyful. We can practice finding the true source of peace and joy within. In this podcast episode, I share exactly how to find that free and infinite wellspring of contentment that no object, circumstance or amount of money will ever bring.
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0:02
Welcome to path to peace with Todd Perelmuter. I'm your host, Todd Perelmuter our world is a projection of our collective consciousness. The more peace we bring into our lives, the more peace we bring into this world. So let the transformation begin.
0:23
This is such an important question that really gets at the heart of everything we try to do in our lives.
0:35
Contentment, and satisfaction are the opposite of suffering. When we are fully content, we feel fully fulfilled.
0:51
And when we are in that state, there is no longing, no craving. There is no trying to find meaning in life or wondering about our purpose. There is only peace and clarity. And that is the state we're all trying to reach that lasting happiness.
1:25
A lot of people think that the answer to contentment is getting that next promotion that big raise that new car, that house we've been wanting. But we all know people who have everything we could ever want, and are completely miserable.
1:49
Contentment does not lie in possessions, because as soon as that new car smell wears off, so does the happiness so does that feeling of dopamine, that rush of dopamine, that pleasured drug chemical in our brain, from when we win a game of cards, to buying a new large purchase. It is temporary, and always comes with suffering later on, you know, fear of losing that thing. Or just chasing after that hit like a heroin addict just chasing that dragon.
2:38
A lot of people will say we need to practice gratitude. And keep a gratitude journal and write down the things we're grateful for. And while that does help, gratitude is actually a symptom of contentment, it is not the source of contentment.
3:03
When we get to the source, when we feel the bliss, of pure being, of just the joy of being alive, we feel grateful for everything and everyone around us, it comes naturally. So how do we experience this bliss?
3:27
There's a few ways. And what we first need to do is connect with ourselves on a deep level and communicate with every cell in our body, that contentment is not something external, that we cannot find it from accumulating possessions will never find it from a drug or any pleasurable activity.
4:04
Those only conditioned the mind to believe that the right circumstances will give us contentment, that some external situation some food or drug or person's love, will give us the contentment we're looking for.
4:29
So we actually need to do the complete opposite of that.
4:34
Instead of perfecting our situation, we need to perfect our inner situation. And the way we do that is by doing the things that nourish us from the inside.
4:50
And the way we do that, is we have to look to nature. Look to our own human nature. And notice the things that we evolved to do. Because what we evolved to do are the things that make us truly happy. Like an animal, running free in the wild, fully present without a care in the world, except maybe for humans, and bears.
5:28
But those things are a walk through nature, spending some time appreciating the beauty that is in nature, and connecting with that lifeforce energy that surrounds us, when we're in nature, that peaceful, loving, nurturing, sustaining energy. It's the only reason we're here is this loving energy from nature that provides us the fruits that we eat in the air that we breathe.
6:11
And if nature is too far, it can be a plant in the house and just communing, meditating, with the plant, and just appreciating the beauty and the intricacy that is in every cell of the plant. And you can see the beauty of it from a distance and you can get as close to the leaf and see the veins and just the mesmerizing patterns all around it.
6:44
We evolved to be surrounded by nature 24/7. And in cities, we've become very disconnected. And it is one of the major sources of unhappiness. And so many people having lived in New York that I know are even unaware that they are so miserable because they are lacking nature in their lives. And I know so many people who grew up in New York, and they don't even like nature. And yet they can't figure out why they're unhappy, stressed, neurotic.
7:25
So simply do your best to surround yourself in nature. Take your shoes off, and walk through the sand or the grass, wherever that's safe to do so. Have some plants have a pet. All of these things nourish our soul.
7:45
They are essential to us as living beings. So often, we forget that we are animals and that we have these animalistic needs. And this is one of the most important ones that is not being met that we are living in sterile environments. So very simply as much as you can, as much as is available to you.
8:13
Swim in lakes and rivers, walk barefoot in the grass in the sand and lay in the grass at a park and try to recreate that environment that we evolved to thrive in. Every day, once a week, whatever is available to you.
8:42
The more time we spend in nature, the more time we spend looking at the beauty of nature around us, the more blessed we will feel, the more gratitude and contentment will naturally flow flow from us. The second thing that's very important to feel that contentment in life is creating as many of those moments of awe and wonder as we can in our lives. It can be spending a few minutes to watch the sunset every night or the sunrise in the morning.
9:28
It can be going to an art museum or playing classical music or any kind of art and music that you love. And just allowing yourself to reconnect with that which inspires the awe and wonder and beauty and majesty of life.
9:54
The more chances we give ourselves To see the beauty and wonder in this world the more gratitude and feeling of bliss naturally washes over us.
10:18
Unfortunately, a lot of modern architecture doesn't exactly inspire as it used to. And it's so important that we find these inspirations in our lives, that give us the sense that life is worth living.
10:39
There is a big difference between the attention span, shortening content on our phone and watching a sunset, or staring at a painting. You know, one feeds our neurosis and our impatience, which makes us constantly wanting the next Tik Tok video to come up on our phone. And one allows our mind to become present and conscious and to find that peacefulness that is really all too often missing. From the fast paced, chaotic, modern society.
11:33
We literally have discontentment devices in our phone, they are only showing us something better than where we are. Now, error is something someone else has that we want. And they are engines of discontent.
11:53
And, in addition to art, and music, and allowing ourselves to just appreciate the beauty in a slower pace, is to appreciate the little things and find the beauty that is everywhere around you. Because it is everywhere around you. The way light reflects off your glass, the way the sound of water, maybe dripping out of a leaky faucet can even be beautiful. And if you are not feeling that there is beauty all around you, it is so vital to look deeper.
12:37
Because contentment is literally found all around us if we just pay attention. And the third thing that I'll say that is essential is to really remember that.
13:03
And how I said earlier that consuming leads to discontent, because there's never enough stuff. There's never the perfect moment that lasts forever. And so one way to break out of that consumeristic mindset is to go from consumer to creator.
13:28
When we consume, there is always more, there is always something else we want. That makes us not content and not satisfied. We want a prettier partner or a better paying job. And all of this is stemming from that comparative mindset, you know, something about the present moment not being good enough.
14:00
And it is really that consumer mindset. That is the materialistic Chase, that we're all on most of our lives. And so it's vitally important to spend some time every day if possible, but whatever works for you to go from consumer to creator, which means to beat a drum. Strum a guitar, drum some pictures, paint, sculpt. Make art projects with your kids.
14:44
Make decorations for your home, whatever it is, whatever you're drawn to knitting and sewing, anything at all. Get creative. It is such nourishment for the soul. And that consumption, even if we're billionaires is emptiness inside.
15:08
And there is no destination, to that chasing game and the act of pure creation, even if you are the worst artist or musician on Earth, it's not about any finished product. It's simply about losing yourself in the present moment, which is really the ultimate finding yourself, because that is where everything happens in this moment, in the here, and now, when you are fully absorbed in the present moment, there is no longing for contentment, longing for meaning or purpose, there is only satisfaction, fulfillment, and contentment. And art is one of the most meditative practices there is.
16:04
It can even be singing in the shower or singing, while cooking, or taking an improv class or acting in local theater, all of these things are so enriching, because they force you into the present moment with your full attention. And it is an incredibly powerful practice for creating that contentment, with life with whatever is it is medicine for the soul. We all have an inner artist inside of us, and it is just waiting to come out. So let it out.
16:49
And speaking of meditative practices, like art, or even exercising, swimming, and running, these are all incredibly meditative practices that allow you to be in the moment alone with your thoughts. And just put aside all the distractions, all the longings and cravings, and just be.
17:19
Meditation is also an incredible tool for gaining that contentment, because it's literally the practice of making peace with nothing. And then anything else in our lives becomes just icing on the cake. We don't need it. We're not craving it.
17:39
We're not longing for it after it's gone. We're not resisting what we find negative. We're just allowing whatever is to be, and by making peace with the nothingness in meditation.
17:57
We bring that contentment to every single activity, and every moment in our lives. When we live from pleasure to pleasure, and we don't take a moment to meditate, then as soon as the pleasure is over, we feel longing for it. We crave it. And even while we're enjoying the thing, we may fear that it's going to end soon.
18:30
And so when we meditate, only appreciation for whatever happens in our life exists because we are already at peace with nothing.
18:44
And the final thing we can do to feel that constant contentment, which is really what we all want. Really goes to the food for the soul. And that is food for the body also, which is fresh fruits and vegetables. I know it sounds silly, but drinking plenty of water. eating plenty of fruits and vegetables makes us feel amazing.
19:16
And when we don't feel good, what do we want to do? We want to eat ice cream and pizza and feel even worse. We want to drink alcohol or take drugs to make that pain go away. And so if we really want to feel total Mind Body Soul contentment, we have to feed our body what it's craving. And we have to look to nature again and how we evolved. Which means seeds and nuts, fruits and vegetables. And we will feel amazing and it won't be that moment of pleasure from chocolate cake amazing. It will be A lasting permanent real energy and awesomeness. And that's what we're all looking for.
20:13
So those are the secrets to lasting contentment.
20:20
Get into nature. In you know, the color green, just on its own, actually, subconsciously tells your body to feel good because that is why we seek out lush forests and nature that has water sources for us to survive. And just the color green is programmed into our DNA to feel better. And that is why humans have survived because we sought out those places.
20:54
And that is why running water, taking a shower, going swimming, nourishes the soul so much you know, laying on the beach or going swimming in the ocean. These are vitally important to every human being. So tap into that inner monkey of yours. Allow yourself the time to sit and reflect, be awed and amazed by the beauty, in life and all around you.
21:30
And from that, gratitude will flow like the Mighty Mississippi and you will realize deep down that everything you need in life you already have. And there is no need for longing, craving, desire, or even resisting anything in life. Because everything is perfect, just as it is.
21:59
Thank you so much for listening, peace and love.
22:04
You've been listening to path to peace with Todd Perelmuter. Being here and putting in this important and noble work is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself and others. If you found this podcast even a little helpful. Please make sure to leave a review so it can reach others who may be in need. And remember, the path to peace starts with a single step.